So the production animal sister phones to say there is a pig dystocia (difficult birth... welcome to my world!
) So I round up a whole lot of students and we head off into the great blue yonder. We arrive at the "farm" which is more like a rubbish tip than anything else, with a few pigs scattered about, and I warned the students NOT TO TOUCH ANYTHING... the last thing I want is for us to bring Foot and Mouth back to the Onderstepoort Veterinary Academic Hospital... not something you really want on your CV!!! Anyway, the gilt (female pig 1st time giving birth - you'll thank me when you can sneak that word into dinner tabler conversation! ) had managed to have 10 piglets already, but had now given up (I think i would have too, under the circumstances!) Anyway, we had to help her with the last two... well, we think there were too, because a sow's uterus (another random fact for the day!) reaches like, as far forward as her sternum, which means there ain't no way my arm, even at full stretch is going to be able to tell if there was another piglet in the most cranial portion! So we attempted to ultrasound her, with one of the student on "remove-piglet-from-ultrasound-probe- and-Dr May's- fingers" duty, because those little blighters have very sharp teeth and they were hungry. So after a good hour sorting that pig out, one of the students wanders off and comes back saying there was another one having a bit of trouble!! I was like, 'Do not go and look for trouble or more work for us!!!" Anyway, there was a little piglet stuck - he hadn't assumed the diving position necessary to come out, so quickly rearranged him and then ushered the students out of the farrowing shed (ah ha, another good word!) before they could find any more work for me to do!! I made them scrub themselves down and disinfect everything before we climbed into the bus! Touch wood, no Foot & Mouth as yet!!Then I got a call from a lady who wanted to know if she could use a human pregnancy kit to check if her dog was pregnant? Um, that would be a no. But she was quite insistent, so I had to tell her that the hormone that the human pregnancy kits test for is, funnily enough only found in pregnant humans!!! And therefore, making your dog pee on a stick, is not going to diagnose if it's pregant. But she still wouldn't believe me, and I spent about 10 minutes on the phone trying to dissuade her!! Funny lady!
On a more random note, I was filling my car up with petrol, when a very snazzy 2 seater BMW (I don't know what type!) screamed to a halt in the middle of the forecourt and a tall, angry man leapt out and yelled at the top of his voice, 'You are the 5th person i've asked, now where the f*** is Wonderboom airport?" Luckily he didn't seem to be addressing this tirade at me, but to the world in general. I think, according to the logo on his shirt, that he was probably a pilot (wanting the airport, that was also a clue!) and that he was probably late, given the state that he was in. He then proceeded to rant that,' nobody who lives here knows where the f***ing airport is" Some, rather brave man took him on, and attempted to explain how he was to get to the airport, but managed to send him the most convoluted and complicated way, and i'm pretty sure that 15 minutes down the line, he was going to be pulling into another petrol station and shouting just the same sort of things!!! And then he jumped in his car and zoomed off. Random, huh?!
And then I went to the chemist to get a rabies booster - no. no. it's just the booster, but there have been a few cases diagnosed around here recently, and it's not really something you want to play around with! I can see i've just put all the oversease people off, what with talk of Foot & Mouth disease and now Rabies....! Anyway, so I buy the vaccine (R350!!! You'd think it would be free!!!) and the clinic sister was going to give me the injection. So she's waffling on about her dogs, and the neighbours dogs etc etc. and I watch as she opens the vaccine and the drops it!!! On the floor!!! Smashed into small peices!!! Oh dear, she says, i'll just have to get another one! Hmm, at R350 a pop, i don't think her boss is going to be so impressed! Then she asks if I know the matron at Onderstepoort, which i do, and then proceeds to tell me that when the matron studied human nursing, then this clinic sister was one of her lecturers... So I did some mental maths, and now our matron is the other side of middle aged which would make this sister, well, quite old!!! And the fact that she'd just dropped my rabies vaccination all over the floor!!! So I was thinking, OMG, she's going to have to inject me now!!! Luckily, it was not sore at all!
Ok, think that's enough rambling for today - I'm working on Outpatients tonight, which for those of you that don't know, it's like a normal vet practice, but staffed by students. So I've got to check that they're giving the right drugs, making the right diagnosis + not forgetting anything important... can be a little stressful at times!! Like last night, i spent quite a lot of time, carefully getting urine from a rather uncooperative cat via a needle and syringe. So I carefully give the aforementioned sample to the student, explain what tests i'd like her to do, and then said she should make a smear, and just tap the sample contained to get the urine to re-mix. So what does she do? She gives it a massive shake.... down the sink!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WTF??!!!!! I'd just spent the last 15 minutes obtaining that sample, it's 9:30pm, I want to home AND THERE IS NO MORE URINE IN THE CAT!!!!! Eish.
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